You heard what love can do to you

Dear person in control of the music at my local dining hall,

I love you. I know we've never met, but what obstacle can age or gender possibly be? If you're a girl or gay guy, I want to be your best friend and if you're a straight guy, I want to date you. Usually we just get some radio station piped in (usually country or oldies), but lately, at certain times, we're getting stuff that's infinitely better. The Backstreet Boys' greatest hits? Jesse McCartney (second) album tracks? New Kids on the Block's "Twisted"? It's like you're communicating to me via one of those high-pitched dog whistles--no one else understands or is even aware, but I totally get you.

Please write back. I need to know what your hours are so I don't accidentally walk in while "Ring Of Fire" is playing again.

XOXO,
Poster Girl